


What would it feel like to put this baggage down?

by mercutiglo



Series: Song Fics [2]
Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Angst, Dreams, M/M, Mention of Cecil Kanagawa, Other, Song fic, Who would've guessed. Me? Writing Angst? Wild, dream/nightmare, injury mention, more tags to come
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2020-12-27 04:30:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21112673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercutiglo/pseuds/mercutiglo
Summary: Sleeping At Last - Six"If I'm being honestI'm not sure I'd know howI want to take shelter but I'm ready, ready to fightAnd somewhere in the middle I feel a little paralyzedBut maybe I'm stronger than I realize"





	1. Chapter 1

_ I had the most vivid dream _

_ My feet had left the ground _

_ I was floating to heaven _

_ But I could only look down _

  
  
  


He looked down at the planet below him, becoming slowly smaller and smaller, the details in the red soils becoming more obscured the further the ship got away. Peter had lucked out in getting a seat near the window this time so he could watch as they passed the different parts of space, but if anything it made him more homesick than when he would just get the cheapest seat possible in the back where there were no windows at all. He had also lucked out in that none of the passengers that were supposed to be sat in his row next to him hadn’t showed up, so he was able to get out of having to get roped into any unwanted conversations.

At some point, he drifted off. Not that he hadn’t tried to stay awake, considering he had done his fair share of heists on ships of this sort, so he knew the possibilities for someone to come by and take something while he slept, but he knew that he was in for a long journey so he accepted as sleep came over him.

But at first it was hard for him to even realize that he had fallen asleep because his dream started out with him in the same position, sitting by the window as Mars shrank beneath him. But he was by himself on the ship, except for one person, sitting at the seat across from him, the other window. “Juno?”

  
  
  


_ My mind was heavy _

_ Running ragged with worst case scenarios _

_ Emergency exits and the distance below _

_ I woke up so worried that the angels let go _

  
  
  


Juno turned to look when he heard his name, but seemed not to notice that Peter was the one who said it despite the fact that they were the only two on the ship. Peter stood up, but still Juno seemed not to see him. "Juno!" Peter yelled again, moving towards Juno. He locked eyes with Juno just as the ship decided to lurch forwards, sending them both smashing into the seats in front of them. When Peter looked up he couldn't see Juno. "Juno, where are you?!" he yelled, frantically looking around for him. The lights were flickering, and there were safety warnings going off while the ship was tilting from side to side and bouncing up and down. He thought he heard some sort of announcement from the pilot, asking for everyone to stay seated and stay calm, but he couldn't be sure, he was just worried about finding Juno and making sure he was okay. 

When he finally found Juno, he was at the front of the ship, up against the doors that led to where the pilots were, blood streaming out of his temple. He half ran, half fell towards him as the plane took a nosedive right as he got into the center aisle, and when he reached Juno he was barely conscious. There was some sort of flight attendant that had appeared from somewhere, asking the both of them to move towards the emergency exits, but when he looked up he realized that they had no face, what should have been their face was just blank, and there was no indication of a mouth that their words should have been coming from. The door to the Pilot's room opened, and out stepped Cecil Kanagawa, with no one else in there that could have been the pilot, meaning that at this point there was no one piloting the ship. "Smile for the camera, Mister Nureyev," he said, a gruesome smile emerging across his face.

Peter woke with a start, looking around frantically. Since there was no one sitting next to him, there was no one to bombard him with questions about whether or not he was okay, and for a moment he was worried he was still in the dream when he didn't see anyone else sitting next to him, but when he looked around he noticed people in the other rows, all listening to music or watching movies on the small televisions placed in the backs of the seats in front of them. He stopped moving his head for a moment, to ensure that the ship was not indeed crashing, and was relieved when he came to the conclusion that the ship was not indeed going to be crashing any time soon. 

  
  
  


_ Oh God I'm so tired _

_ Of being afraid _

  
  
  


He knew that what had happened wasn't real, but it worried him. He had accepted that he was going to move on, without Juno Steel, off of Mars, living his own life according to his own rules, without anyone to tie him to anywhere, no one and nothing to hold him back. 

So why was he so afraid of losing Juno Steel again?


	2. Chapter 2

What would it feel like

To put this baggage down?

If I'm being honest

I'm not sure I'd know how

When they arrived on Neptune he looked around and realized that he was certainly on a different planet from Mars, in so many ways that maybe he wouldn't even miss it. He needed to change something in his life, so why not have it be his location? He retrieved his items from the cargo area, and stood there for a little while. What was his plan? He had his single bag that held the rest of his belongings that hadn't come with him in the cabin on the ship and it was all of a sudden much heavier than he thought. Was it because of that dream he had had? Was there more emotional baggage in him than he thought there was? He wasn't sure what to do with that knowledge. He hadn't developed overly close relationships with many people before Juno, really it was only Mag that had truly known him before his lovely Martian detective. And when he no longer really had Mag to hold him back, he hadn't felt nearly as bad as he did right at that moment. He wasn't sure where he was going, but his heart was telling him to get back on the next ship back to Mars, and to get back to Hyperion City so that he could stay with Juno this time instead of running away.

  
  
  


I want to take shelter but I'm ready, ready to fight

And somewhere in the middle I feel a little paralyzed

But maybe I'm stronger than I realize

  
  
  


"Hi, you look new here, and frankly a little lost! Completely starting over your old life?" someone asked him, shaking him out of his haze. There was a person standing in front of him with a clipboard, their face bright and eager, clearly not payed enough for whatever work they were doing but at least they were doing something that they seemed to maybe enjoy.

"Something.... Something like that," he responded. The person in front of him was shorter than him by at least a foot. They had large glasses that magnified their brilliant brown eyes. Their hair was short and matched their eye color almost precisely, even incorporating the golden rims around the iris as the roots of their hair.

"Well, what are the chances you're looking for a new job? Because the Neptunian Research Community is looking for some new scientists to help with the various brands of scientific research that they're conducting to find cures for -"

"I'm actually not a scientist, I'm sorry," he responded. Their grin seemed to grow just a little bit.

"That's perfectly fine! We administer training of all kinds and levels depending on your assigned research lab, and you don't need to be an expert! We have at least five experts on each team in the field, so you would be working more on data collection and the experts in your assigned team would be the ones creating and analyzing the experiments." They pushed their clipboard towards him. "We also offer fully paid for accomodations, so you wouldn't have to worry about payment either."

Peter looked down at the clipboard for a moment, not moving to take it or anything. Was he ready to give up on Mars? Was scientific research what he wanted to start doing? He supposed it didn't really matter, it was just a way for him to take his mind off of what he was leaving behind. His heart, his brain, his soul were all pushing him to get back on a ship, to not take the pen, to go back to the arms of Juno Steel.

"You're very convincing you know that?" he said as he took the clipboard from them. "So tell me a little more about the kinds of scientific research you do...."

**Author's Note:**

> WHOOPS I wrote most of this last year and then I'm here like "wow might as well post it because I'm in the mood to" but also it's not actually done so time to FIGURE OUT HALF THIS FIC but yall can have part of it now
> 
> (also, quick note just to be 100% covered, these lyrics are not mine, they're from the fabulous song by sleeping at last that you should go listen to, kthx)
> 
> Also this is set in like. nebulous jupeter time you know. 
> 
> Kudos/Comment/Subscribe so you know when I post more of it! you know how i like my cliff hangers!


End file.
